WAIT, WHAT...EXCUSE ME!!!
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Perspective

4/19/2018

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Wait, What, where is this in the title?  I Have been thinking a lot about life and taking a moment to put things into perspective.  To stop and breathe and enjoy the things that I have an maybe not ponder all that I have lost.  There have been many tragedies in my time and I try to push on and learn and teach about them but this is not always an option.  There are things I will never understand.  Things that I will never get over.  And things that make such an impact on my heart they change me.  Recently I had some of those things come up,  They brought me back to a time when my brother passed away or really was murdered.  He was 3 weeks passed his 24th birthday when he crossed paths with someone who did not want him around and killed him.  No explanation.  No story.  No witness and no one who ever was prosecuted.  I will never understand, never get over it and it changed me profoundly.  It changed everyone around me profoundly right down to who I have around me.  My parents were forever people who had to do the worst thing ever, bury a child.
I have watched others bury their children and regardless of how this occurred it will never be understood.  If it is fast or slow, you expect it, or you don't one can never understand the death of child.  And the reality is anyone who is younger than me and passes is a child.  It is amazing to me how many people I have had to bury in my 38 years of life.  My father has even commented on this factor.  
Its days and times like this that my defenses are up.  That my passion for other people comes out, and I have to sit and gain some perspective to answer my denials of why.   What perspective should I gain?  What have I lost? What have you lost?  Help a sister out and share.  Be in the now.  Stop and smell those beautiful roses hidden far beneath the bitter snow.  
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    Jenifer Roth is a full time super woman...in her mind!  Well she is good at being ok at the all the roles she takes on.  Enjoy the ride!

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